


Temptation

by CadetDru



Series: Seven Sins of the Arrangement [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Fluff, Lust, M/M, Post-Canon, Seven Deadly Sins, The Arrangement (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-02 00:05:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19187926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CadetDru/pseuds/CadetDru
Summary: Aziraphale has taken notes on seduction.  The key to it being a sin is not to deliver.





	Temptation

The chair was facing away from Aziraphale as he walked into the back room of his shop.  It was occupied, which it had no right to be. Crowley was sprawled across the chair, only one leg vaguely where it should have been. His body was twisted around, his limbs splayed in all possible directions. The invitation of his nearly prone body was hidden from Aziraphale's view.  He glanced over the back towards Aziraphale, dark glasses off. His snake eyes flashed. "Fancccccy a sssssnack before dinner?" he hissed, holding a too-red apple out towards Aziraphale.

Aziraphale couldn’t even look at him while he snatched away the apple.  He took a bite, closing his eyes and smiling to himself. The apple was perfectly delicious. Some juice threatened to spill past his lips. He swallowed carefully.   "I already know the difference between good and evil."

"You should," Crowley said, sounding delighted. "Then you should know that you failed."  He reached towards Aziraphale and took the apple back. The angel sighed and walked away to examine books, to look at anything else. Crowley rearranged himself so he could get out of the chair without knocking the thing over.  Crowley slithered on two legs, stalked his way towards Aziraphale. "Are you sulking?"

"I was eating that," the angel scolded.

"You have to try to resist." Crowley said, juice spilling onto his hand as he bit into the apple. "You’re the nice one after all."  He licked the juice away, his snake eyes still focused on Aziraphale.

"What else could I do?" Aziraphale waved his hand towards the chair. "That was not just a snake whispering for me to try some new fruit. That was a redhead in tight pants sprawling obscenely across my chair, offering me a ‘snack.’" Aziraphale snorted. "I'd miss dinner for that. Spoil my appetite, you could say."

"Sprawling. Redhead." Crowley spat.  He snapped his fingers and the apple was gone.   

"Obscenely," Aziraphale said. "That isn't how I see you personally, that's just the tableau presented. You're either deliberately playing on our history or just playing to your own assets. The subtlety is thin at best, but obviously very effective in this case. It's hardly fair, but I held up and now you won't even let me have the apple." He was almost whining.

"Obvious, now?" Crowley spat.   "And you know all about this sort of thing?"

Aziraphale smiled almost sadly.  "Thanks to the Arrangement, I've participated in more than my share of seductions.  The key to the temptation is to leave them wanting more, encourage them to sin again.  I’ve made quite a study of it, you know. Officially, I need to know what I’m thwarting.  Practically, I need to know what I’m doing when I’m filling in for you. And personally…"

"Personally?" Crowley prompted.  

"Well, I need to know what I like.  To do, and to...have done," Aziraphale trailed off.

Crowley’s face changed from hurt and anger to a smile that was crooked and cruel and encouraging.  "Sprawling redheads."

"Oh, I highly appreciate the effect, but I can't let go the way you can." Aziraphale waved his hand in a vague figure eight in Crowley's direction. "I don't have the right kind of throat. Or spine. Bones in general, that’s what’s wrong. And I can’t take on that same kind of attitude, that shop display."

"Shop display?" Crowley hissed.  

Aziraphale spread his arms wide, kicked out one heel.  "Everything out for anyone to see."

Crowley laughed despite himself.  

Aziraphale's gaze softened as he looked at nothing in particular, remembering his most terrifying day.  "Of course I did get that chance to be you in a bath of holy water in Hell. I played that up as safely as possible.  All slinky and slithering, legs splayed in the bath as I ignored their attempted torment.  I wanted to be sure I did what you would do."

"Legs splayed," Crowley echoed.  "What do you think of me, angel?"

"I think you command the attention of everyone in the room, even when you don't want to, because of all that serpentine smoothness. It was such a waste to use it that day, but what other chance would I get? I wish I could've seen the effect of it. I wish I could..." Aziraphale unnecessarily cleared his throat.

Crowley shook his head. "How would-- how do you do it, then? In your own body, how do you seduce someone?"

Aziraphale dithered, his hands making furtive, aborted gestures. He started towards Crowley, then stopped.  He seemed hopelessly distressed that Crowley almost wanted to make him a cup of tea and encourage him to have a lie-down.  He took a deep breath, straightened his shoulders, and slowly walked over to Crowley, his eyes focusing on the dilated snake eyes.  He lifted one hand towards Crowley's face without quite making contact, laid the other on Crowley's bicep and squeezed a little too hard. He kept the eye contact, started to slowly move closer. He took Crowley’s face in his hand, ran his thumb over Crowley’s lower lip.  

"Is this it then?" Crowley hissed, his words hot on Aziraphale’s withdrawing thumb.

Aziraphale gave a holy smile, delighted to have been seen though. It was the smile he gave Crowley every time he was tempted to something he was wanting to do anyway. "Yes," Aziraphale said, patting Crowley on the shoulder and stepping back.  "Subtlety. That's the key. It's always worked for me. And you've gotten the credit every time."

"Thank you for the lesson," Crowley hissed.  "I suppose that's harder to resist than obscene sprawling?"

"I've never had the opportunity to compare the two."  He snapped his fingers. "Why don't we compare and contrast after dinner?"

Crowley reached over to touch Aziraphale's jawline.  "Absolutely."

**Author's Note:**

> [this author apparently chooses not to deliver either]


End file.
